When God Speaks

 I love the Lord, because He hears My voice and my supplications. Because He has inclined His ear to me, Therefore I shall call upon Him as long as I live. Ps 116:1-2

Right now I'm at my dad's house in NJ....about 45 minutes from my home. I will be here until Sunday afternoon. Yesterday I had a visit to my dentist.  After some maneuvering to get the antibiotic I need to take prior to the appointment and after picking up my laptop which I'd accidentally left at home, we were on our way.  I was nervous as I sat in the chair....I have Sjogrens which is an autoimmune disease that dries up all of your normally moist regions.  That means almost no saliva. Dry eyes, Dry throat.  And one of the consequences of this is tooth decay.  I'm embarrassed by my teeth...they are full of fillings and I've had 3 teeth extracted. (thankfully nothing overtly visible).  Usually a checkup (which I try to do twice a year) will turn up one or several cavities.   I've been making an  effort...brushing my teeth several times a day and flossing....

So there I was in the dentist's chair with a neck pillow supporting my head and striving valiantly to keep my mouth as wide open as possible....(I have a form of arthritis that also has affected my jaw..I can only open my mouth a little way and it is quite painful) . I prayed "Lord, please no cavities this time!!" and I heard once more, the quiet "Do You Trust Me?"  and I answered "Lord if this question that I've heard you repeat to me numerous times in the past two weeks, and each time you responded with victories that ranged from providential to remarkable, if this question is some magical lucky charm to me, then please keep my mind from producing it. But I believe, wholeheartedly that it is You, showing yourself to be faithful and merciful to me.  And as such, I believe that once again, you will answer my prayer." And the dentist straightened  up and said "Good news! No cavities this time!"  And I whispered in my heart "thank  you Jesus."

The receptionist at the dentist has been a family friend for many years.  She shared with me that she had just lost her mom.  I commiserated with her, telling her of my mom's death almost two years ago...and offered her my sympathies.  She questioned me about my health and I summerized for her these years of struggle--without going into specifics--and she said several times "I don't know how you manage! How do you survive??"  I told her, "I would NOT have survived if it were not for God.  He has gotten me through countless difficulties, pain, and heartache."  She said "Oh, are you a Believer?"  And I affirmed that I am.  It was a small thing. But I hope maybe it will cause her to consider that there is a God and He does love us and maybe she would be willing to meet Him in her sorrow for her mom. I pray that He brings her solace.

Now, about God's repeated question to me about whether or not I trust Him.....I know that it is not my own internal "voice" that asks me this.   When I go to Him in need of something I don't think to myself "I will repeat 'Do you trust Me?' and that will bring a solution."--because that line of thinking is just foolish.  No. The verity of this voice and the proof that it comes from God is that in situation after situation, He not only makes me pause to reflect on His faithful character---but  He answers my needs sometimes miraculously and always notably.  My own magical thinking could not do that.  And with each repetition, with each answer to my prayers, God has been pointing out to me that HE IS COMPLETELY FAITHFUL and I need never fear anything.  He has carved out a quiet place in my heart and mind where as soon as I hear Him ask for my trust, all fear, all worry, all uncertainty fades and I KNOW that I have received the answer to my request for help.

I have a friend, a man who told me recently, that he has never heard the voice of God....in all his many years of believing in God, to him, God has been silent.  I cannot imagine that.  I cannot fathom that.  God talks to me all the time.  He guides my reading; He comes to my rescue; He gives me guidance; He comforts my soul in its distresses. How do you worship a silent God?  I do not know.  I don't believe that God has been silent toward him.  I just think he does not know how to recognize or trust what he is "hearing" and maybe he has shushed God so many times, that God really has stopped speaking to him...which is just sad.

When God speaks, I listen.
I must.