Where did I put my Joy?

I've been watching a series of DVD's of a conference given by John Piper, a renowned minister and author, called "When I don't Desire God"...It covers the material in his book by the same title and then some.  That book was the offshoot of his more well known book, "Desiring God:" and addresses the problem of people for whom God does not awaken a passion and joy in their hearts when they think of him or are in his presence.  One might be tempted to think that it is not so important how we feel about God as long as we obey him....but as Piper is pointing out in this series, nothing could be farther from the truth.

He gives many many examples taken from Scripture to back this idea...
One of them that struck me was " Because you did not serve the Lord your God with joyfulness and gladness of heart, because of the abundance of all things, therefore you shall serve your enemies" (Deut 28:47)  In other words, "if you're going to be miserable around me, then be miserable around someone with whom you should be miserable."  God wants us to exult in him.  He also wants us to exalt him.  And the truth is that when we exult in him, he is exalted.  Piper puts it this way, "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him"

Is it sin not to take delight in God?
It is not only sin; it is the mark of someone who does not even know God.  It is a crucial issue: Does God have first place in our hearts?  If not, then we are guilty of breaking first and last commandments.  "Have no other gods before me."  If we love something more than we love God (Money, family, prestige, our "stuff"), then those things are false gods to us....and God calls himself "jealous"...He is jealous of us the way our lover would be jealous....He gives us all of his love and passion...it is only right that he should want ours in return.  Besides, to really experience God fully and to take delight in his Person is a gift to us also...We are not gratifying God's ego--We are allowing him to express his love to us by giving us the gift of himself, for there can be no greater, no more rewarding or delightful gift to be had.  

illustration from "The Story of Stuff" with Annie Leonard

And if we love something that is besides our God...we are desiring other than God...This is coveting--an issue of the heart.  It is misdirected desire.  God is to be the source of the fulfillment of our desires; our treasure trove of satisfactions.  He is our all in all.  This principle was illustrated in the New Testament when the rich young ruler asked Jesus what he might do to earn eternal life.  Jesus told him to keep the commandments....and listed some of them.  The young man replied that he'd kept those commands....but then Jesus came in for the kill.  He zeroed in on the heart misdirection that the man had as when in response to Jesus' injunction to sell all he had and give it to the poor and then to come and follow him; the young man could not comply and walked away sad.  And  he walked away with out Jesus.  And he walked away without eternal life.

It's a frightening thought...that God will be our all, or he will be nothing to us.  But the Bible seems to make this quite clear.

As I've been watching these videos, I've been testing myself; questioning my love for God to see if it is as pure and as passionate as God commands and wants it to be.  Years ago, I fought the battle of the "stuff" and after much mental preparation and prayer, I asked a friend to come into my house. I showed her all my possessions--my greatest treasures. And I told her to take what she wanted of them.  Just to help herself.  And the test to myself was for me to let her...and to have no regrets about it...for it was my  gift to God of my heart.   But now, I wonder if I could do that again. I think I could....but that doesn't prove really a passion for God...it just proves an open hand with my belongings...It proves I can be content with or without my belongings.  I am not sure how I could test my desire for God.  But I've asked myself some disturbing questions in an attempt to do this.

I asked myself what I would do if I wanted to do something to make myself happy.  Would I spend time with the Lord and his Word....? Or would I buy myself something?
I asked myself why, if I love God above all else, I do not talk to him more than I do.
It's easy to tell God, "Lord, I would give up everything for you.  I would die for you," But when he asks us to give up something much less...or to do something much easier....we somehow are unable or unwilling--does this not show a disregard for God?  If I found all my joy in him, would I not gladly do anything he asked of me?

It is good to assess ourselves; to ask ourselves hard questions...because someday we will be giving answers to these questions...and then the answers will be written in pen...or engraved in stone....and unchangeable. Much better it is, to address them now while there is still opportunity to change our responses.   I cannot talk myself into being ecstatic over God.  I cannot increase my love for him as an act of my will....The disciples asked in amazed concern "Who then, can be saved?"  And Jesus told them, "with man it is impossible...But with God, all things are possible."  I believe that I have to place myself in a position of nearness to God; to meditate on his character and works; to immerse myself in the Word and above all, to pray -- to ask him to ignite a fervor in my heart.  Fasting too, has been described as the fertile soil wherein holiness may grow...To fast is to take my focus off of the material world and my body's demands...and to feast instead on God.  So I can place myself in the position of proximity and readiness to receive...and then ask God to do this in me: show me Himself and to light my passion and joy on fire.  Then I will wait in a state of faith and trust....because God has promised that if we ask of him anything according to his will; he will do it.  And this we can be assured, is something he wants.