Friday, April 2, 2010

Would you CHOOSE to Suffer?

Have you ever had an enemy? Someone who really hated you and tried to do you wrong? Have you ever prayed in frustration that God would just "take him/her out"? David was faced with that situation and temptation when his enemy, King Saul, was pursuing him and trying to take his life. And David was so close to God that I believe, had he prayed this, God might have done it...But David was wiser than that. In Psalm 59 which was written when David was on his first flight from Saul, David asks God to remove His mercy from Saul's life, but adds the request that God not immediately kill him.

Instead, David wants to make a lesson out of Saul's life. An example for all of mankind to see. And a few verses later, David discloses his reason for making this request of God. He wants Saul to be destroyed by his own pride and hatred so that all of history can see this and learn from it. And a verse or two later, he reveals the reason he desires this. It is not for his own personal satisfaction, or so that he can gloat over Saul's misery but rather, it is that David desires Glory to be gained for God so people can see why God has commanded us to obey him and to be humble rather than proud. He wants Saul's own pride and arrogance to cause his destruction.

What did this mean in David's life? Well, rather than having the satisfaction of seeing God eliminate Saul in some immediate and dramatic manner, David chose to be on the run for years: persecuted, frightened, hungry while Saul did his best to kill him and was made a fool of time after time by David's cunning and God's protection of David. David chose this so that all of history would see, learn, and remember that God commands what He does for a reason.

This story struck me. And as my mind has been turning it over this morning, I see that it also applies to my situation. I don't have a person who is my enemy chasing me. Rather, my enemy has been poor health: both physical and mental.

People have prayed over me numerous times asking God to heal me; DEMANDING that God heal me; INSISTING that God owes me healing. And I have not really agreed in my heart with those prayers. Yes, I would truly like to be healthy in body and mind and live a normal life, but my heart has always wanted, more than it wants health, to let God work His will in me WHATEVER THAT MAY BE AND WHERE EVER IT TAKES ME. If He can use me in some greater manner for His glory with me being sick and homebound, then I am willing to do that.

I'm not in any way, shape, or form claiming to be as godly as David! I know I'm not. But in this one case, I can understand how David felt. And I think God provides us the strength and the grace we need to carry out our callings before Him. This morning, as I read of David's and sacrifice to God's glory, I thought to myself, "Wow, I couldn't do that: live in caves and in the desert all those years on the run." But God didn't call me to that. And I am sure that the active leader, David, could not have ever sat sick in his house for years on end either. He was not designed for that, as I was not designed to be on the run. Yes, what God calls us to do; He enables us to do, if our desire is to do it for His glory.

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