This morning I was led to listen to Joni E. Tada's podcast. And I heard her admit that she faces the temptation to not treat her cancer, just to let her life wind down and to go to be with the Lord. This is something I have thought a lot about. I'm waiting for the news about the results of the biopsy of a blockage in my colon. I had a colonoscopy last Friday after having tested positive in a Colo-Guard test. I know that Joni has been vocal about the value of life, regardless of the quality of it (or lack thereof). And Joni has always been open about her hardships...but she has also defended life---even the most limited, challenged, painful life--as being worthwhile...worth much in the eyes of God. So I was rather taken aback at her admission that she struggles with the temptation to just "go gentle into that good night" (to quote Dylan Thomas).
She told of a diabetic woman named Carla, who had suffered one amputation after another. And Carla who had initially been an encouragement and a joyful person, had reached her breaking point. And she shared with Joni that she was tired and ready to be with the Lord simply by just refusing to fight any longer. She quoted from Philippians chapter 1 and verses 22 and 23 where Paul confesses that he longs to go and be with the Lord, "which is better by far" but then Paul comes around and states that there were people who still needed him to be alive. People who need the good news of the Gospel.
If I was to keep on "pressing on" would there be people who need the encouragement that I can give them? Am I encouraging anyone with my life right now? I have to be honest and say that I have not had much of a missional approach to my life. I have not been intentional. And I really need to be. Because if not, there is not much point to me hanging around anymore.
I'm afraid that, a lot of the time, I have lost my smile. And my humor--if it is there at all,--is often cynical. This is not God-honoring. I need to pray for some Joy. I need to find reasons for laughter and a smile. I should be the voice of encouragement to those who maybe are struggling also. This is not a checklist or a shopping list of "Should's" and "Need to's..." One cannot force him or herself to be joyful; or to dig around for a word of encouragement to give someone when you live among the burned up rubble after a conflagration of your own life. I think the secret is not to try to talk myself into smiling, although there may be nothing wrong with doing that in addition, but I think that in order to smile myself, I have to be basking in the smile of God. Author, Randy Alcorn and Dr. John Piper often talk about God's delight and how the word "Blessed" means"Happy." And it may be hard for some of you--like the family and friends of those brutally gunned down in El Paso and Dayton this week--to find a smile. And in fact the picture of a happy God might just bring them to a place of bitterness.
Joni wrote a book called "When God Weeps" that talks about how God bears our burdens and cries with us when we struggle with loss or illness or pain. How can that be? That God is happy and yet heartbroken ? Joni has a favorite quote from a then-17-year-old teen named Steve Estes who discipled and encouraged her in the early days of her disability. When she said "How can a good God permit suffering?" he told her "God permits what he hates in order to accomplish that which he loves."' And also we have to understand that the battle against death, pain and suffering has already been finished! It was finished at the cross. God is not looking at the bottom-side of this tapestry that he is weaving with its tangled and confusing melee of threads. That is our view point right now. Nothing makes sense, and it can be downright ugly here on this broken, bleeding Earth. NO! He sees the incredible, almost completed, design he is weaving..and it will be beautiful beyond our wildest dreams. THAT is why God smiles. THAT is why he is joyful. And sometimes he shares with us--in some of our hardest moments--a peek at what he is doing.
I laid on a stretcher in the hospital with my artificial hip dislocated. I was drenched in sweat and crying in pain. And I said through gritted teeth, "Jesus where ARE you!?" and I heard him say to me "my bones are all out of joint" I recognized that as a quote from Psalm 22 and for the first time I had a GLIMMER, a bit of understanding of the pain he suffered for me. Pain like that is not comprehensible unless you have experienced it. And I began to cry, this time, in Joy, as I realized the magnitude of what he had done for me. And all I could say then was "Thank you. THANK YOU"
Pain is a matter of perspective whether it comes from glimpsing the top of the tapestry or having a glimpse of the beauty and awfulness of the Cross. Pain, in God's eyes, is only going to last a very short time. And it will be long forgotten after he wipes the tears from our eyes.
Here's the link to Joni's devotion and the pod cast that I mentioned. (scroll down on that page for it.)
https://www.joniandfriends.org/perseverance-in-suffering/?utm_source=dailydevo&utm_medium=email
She told of a diabetic woman named Carla, who had suffered one amputation after another. And Carla who had initially been an encouragement and a joyful person, had reached her breaking point. And she shared with Joni that she was tired and ready to be with the Lord simply by just refusing to fight any longer. She quoted from Philippians chapter 1 and verses 22 and 23 where Paul confesses that he longs to go and be with the Lord, "which is better by far" but then Paul comes around and states that there were people who still needed him to be alive. People who need the good news of the Gospel.
If I was to keep on "pressing on" would there be people who need the encouragement that I can give them? Am I encouraging anyone with my life right now? I have to be honest and say that I have not had much of a missional approach to my life. I have not been intentional. And I really need to be. Because if not, there is not much point to me hanging around anymore.
I'm afraid that, a lot of the time, I have lost my smile. And my humor--if it is there at all,--is often cynical. This is not God-honoring. I need to pray for some Joy. I need to find reasons for laughter and a smile. I should be the voice of encouragement to those who maybe are struggling also. This is not a checklist or a shopping list of "Should's" and "Need to's..." One cannot force him or herself to be joyful; or to dig around for a word of encouragement to give someone when you live among the burned up rubble after a conflagration of your own life. I think the secret is not to try to talk myself into smiling, although there may be nothing wrong with doing that in addition, but I think that in order to smile myself, I have to be basking in the smile of God. Author, Randy Alcorn and Dr. John Piper often talk about God's delight and how the word "Blessed" means"Happy." And it may be hard for some of you--like the family and friends of those brutally gunned down in El Paso and Dayton this week--to find a smile. And in fact the picture of a happy God might just bring them to a place of bitterness.
Joni wrote a book called "When God Weeps" that talks about how God bears our burdens and cries with us when we struggle with loss or illness or pain. How can that be? That God is happy and yet heartbroken ? Joni has a favorite quote from a then-17-year-old teen named Steve Estes who discipled and encouraged her in the early days of her disability. When she said "How can a good God permit suffering?" he told her "God permits what he hates in order to accomplish that which he loves."' And also we have to understand that the battle against death, pain and suffering has already been finished! It was finished at the cross. God is not looking at the bottom-side of this tapestry that he is weaving with its tangled and confusing melee of threads. That is our view point right now. Nothing makes sense, and it can be downright ugly here on this broken, bleeding Earth. NO! He sees the incredible, almost completed, design he is weaving..and it will be beautiful beyond our wildest dreams. THAT is why God smiles. THAT is why he is joyful. And sometimes he shares with us--in some of our hardest moments--a peek at what he is doing.
I laid on a stretcher in the hospital with my artificial hip dislocated. I was drenched in sweat and crying in pain. And I said through gritted teeth, "Jesus where ARE you!?" and I heard him say to me "my bones are all out of joint" I recognized that as a quote from Psalm 22 and for the first time I had a GLIMMER, a bit of understanding of the pain he suffered for me. Pain like that is not comprehensible unless you have experienced it. And I began to cry, this time, in Joy, as I realized the magnitude of what he had done for me. And all I could say then was "Thank you. THANK YOU"
Pain is a matter of perspective whether it comes from glimpsing the top of the tapestry or having a glimpse of the beauty and awfulness of the Cross. Pain, in God's eyes, is only going to last a very short time. And it will be long forgotten after he wipes the tears from our eyes.
Here's the link to Joni's devotion and the pod cast that I mentioned. (scroll down on that page for it.)
https://www.joniandfriends.org/perseverance-in-suffering/?utm_source=dailydevo&utm_medium=email
1 comment:
Post a Comment