Today, Saturday, I sit in my room, desperately trying to think of something useful I could do. I have a whole basement that is a mess and I had started on one of the tasks down there, but today am in too much pain to consider even going down the stairs, let alone do any work involving standing.
I had planned to sit out on the deck in my gravity recliner...which I still probably will do....but right now the sky is leaden and unappealing. I charged up my Kindle Paperwhite so I can read out there.
I straightened my room and made my bed....got dressed...and now...WHAT? Then a well known Christian pastor posted something on Facebook which said, "We are human BEings; not human DOings." And that hit me. It's ok sometimes to just be---but if you are used to bustling about and doing this and doing that....isn't it SO hard to just be? We feel guilty and desperately try to create jobs for ourselves so we won't feel like we've "wasted the day." This desire to do does not go away when disability strikes. It simply becomes harder to bear.
So what is left to "do?" I can, and have been, praying. I've read my Bible...Lord what's left? The whisper, "Stay awhile. Sit here with Me." This brings comfort, conviction, and concern. The Lord of all the Universe wants me to sit with Him. I have not done that much...and if I do I always end up writing about it or moving on to something else "more interesting." REALY? what could be more interesting than getting to know God? What will happen? Will He heal me? Show me an answer to a dilemma? Teach me some great truth?
I've seen a poster of this somewhere. And it is all true. Every sentence of it. God just wants us to know and to honor His Almighty Lordship over all Creation...and to BE in His presence; to draw nourishment from Him up through my roots all the way to the bud. God is creating something beautiful of me....allow Him to! Flowers don't work to drink in the rain.
I had planned to sit out on the deck in my gravity recliner...which I still probably will do....but right now the sky is leaden and unappealing. I charged up my Kindle Paperwhite so I can read out there.
I straightened my room and made my bed....got dressed...and now...WHAT? Then a well known Christian pastor posted something on Facebook which said, "We are human BEings; not human DOings." And that hit me. It's ok sometimes to just be---but if you are used to bustling about and doing this and doing that....isn't it SO hard to just be? We feel guilty and desperately try to create jobs for ourselves so we won't feel like we've "wasted the day." This desire to do does not go away when disability strikes. It simply becomes harder to bear.
So what is left to "do?" I can, and have been, praying. I've read my Bible...Lord what's left? The whisper, "Stay awhile. Sit here with Me." This brings comfort, conviction, and concern. The Lord of all the Universe wants me to sit with Him. I have not done that much...and if I do I always end up writing about it or moving on to something else "more interesting." REALY? what could be more interesting than getting to know God? What will happen? Will He heal me? Show me an answer to a dilemma? Teach me some great truth?
"Be still--and know that I am God."
'Be still and know that I AM
Be still and know
Be still
BE'
I've seen a poster of this somewhere. And it is all true. Every sentence of it. God just wants us to know and to honor His Almighty Lordship over all Creation...and to BE in His presence; to draw nourishment from Him up through my roots all the way to the bud. God is creating something beautiful of me....allow Him to! Flowers don't work to drink in the rain.
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