Chris Tomlin O Come all Ye Faithful

Sunday, November 8, 2015

State of the Schiz

This post is just going to be an update.  The state of the schiz. lol.

The best news that I have to report is that I have been very good with my eating...solidly on the "ETL path (Eat To Live- a program by Dr Joel Fuhrman...see: www.drfuhrman.com  ).
My weight is now the lowest it has been since two years ago when I did get to "Onederland" but almost immediately after that , I caved and went off the plan.  I don't recall,. It could have been due to asthma/steroids.  Right now I'm teetering on the brink of  "Onederland" (Onederland is when your weight is in the 100's).  I'm feeling good.  Solidly on the plan and surrounded by support from at least three websites.  I CAN do this! I Will do this!!

Now, my mental status.
I have been plagued by some paranoia.  Some of my old delusions have come home to roost.  They are the kind of delusions which are very feasible...fears of a definite possibility.  Whether or not it is true is not possible to be clarified.  I just have to come up with the faith to deny its reality...and to hope that I am not self-deluded by pretending something isn't true (just to assuage paranoia) when it very likely could be true.  I could drive myself right off the brink with this one.  And it's not a place I want to be.

I've been taking L-Theanine, a naturally occurring amino acid, which is supposed to help diminish positive symptoms (hallucinations, paranoia, delusions) and to increase the quality of my sleep....The jury is out on
this one.  My sleep may possibly be better (even though the night before last, I was up all night with the worst case of insomnia I've had in a long time.)  Last night, sleep  would have been good were it not for a gray furry beast who insisted on sleeping on my stomach with her butt end right in my face. GRRRR.

As far as my mental status on this med? I struggled with olfactory hallucinations early last week...they were plaguing me for at least three days.  And now this paranoia.  I don't know.  I don't know if I should keep the large container of L Theanine powder or not (I also got a trial size which I've been taking for a week or two.)  That big container has 1200 doses in it.  So it only costs pennies a day....but really it's $50 and I'm not sure was a good investment.

I also have ordered Sarcosine.  Another amino acid...and this one is supposed to help you defeat negative symptoms (lack of motivation, poor hygiene, depression, lack of creativity, poverty of speech and thought.)  Honestly this is the one I most look forward to taking.  Negative symptoms are the bane of my existence.

Anyway.
That is the state of the schiz.

Thank you to those of you who are my regular readers for your support and for listening to what I have to say, even when it is not erudite.
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