Tuesday, July 14, 2015

The Journey

Today makes 23 out of 30 days as an inpatient in  our local medical center.  I've missed the whole month of July thus far and a good chunk of time in June.  Asthma was very bad this time....The doctor has me on every conceivable med. In addition to that I have steroid induced diabetes and have been taking insulin.  I had hoped to come home today however I need to get set up with insulin and blood sugar testing equipment.  And tomorrow they will teach me to do that. And I also have to take a test to see if I require O2 on a continual basis.  So maybe on Wednesday I will be able to go home....but that depends on the O2  situation.  If I have to get a concentrator (a portable one) then it may take even longer.  I am COVERED in dark blackish red bruises.  It will take many months  before those begin to heal.

With every attack that I have, I get sicker and sicker....and my dreams of  having a healthy body get farther and farther away.

I finally did order the Instant Pot (a 7 in one featured pressure cooker/slow cooker) and it will be delivered tomorrow.  I am hoping that this piece of equipment will help me with meal prep and will allow me to cook some vegan one-pot meals....I also ordered "Yonana"--a device which makes fruit ice cream (sorbet), and this will arrive tomorrow also.

I need to get my weight under control. And then maybe I will be able to take short walks.  Maybe that dream needs some amending also.  Courting Trouble.  Keeping my Eyes Fixed.  Right now Court is beyond reach.  But does it have to mean that it will stay chaotic?  It is also helping me to have my friend Stephanie "over"---by means of my computer....we talk and laugh and dream.  She is rooting for me in a big way and that helps me. 

 it is not good for me to be alone.  It is not good for anyone to be alone.  But sometimes aloneness happens and we sit in it and live through it...we try not to become alone in our identity.  It is, rather than a destination, a journey.  And it changes us.  But may we keep the eyes of our heart open to the lessons to be learned there.  And may we pay attention to whom it is that walks with us...because they are also gifts from Him to us.


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