The sparkling vision you had of the anticipation that this thing would come to pass has tarnished over the years. And your certainty has waned. Not vanished...just...pushed into the background. Rather than increasing your prayers over the years you let them pale. Are you questioning God? Or do you not even think about it that much anymore....And honestly the likelihood is so tiny....your doubts grow.
See it for what it is: UNBELIEF.
If God keeps the promise at this point you can take no credit for it whatsoever. In fact you may have been a barrier --an obstacle keeping God from bringing you his very best.
Oh God give me the faith of Mary...accepting your Word and your Promise without question. This Lord, is the "pregnant pause?" The time when you are working in the darkened heart of another? Most of all---are my attitudes and words such that they are in line with what God expects of me? Am I a co-laborer with Christ in this? Or am I a stumbling stone? Lord work in my heart. Take over my tongue. Grant me 1 Cor. 13 love...May my heart be a fertile field in which you till your will. May the seed of your promise burrow deep into this soil in my heart. AND IN YOUR TIME: bring it to pass. Forgive me for my unbelief. Use me I pray to work your will....and my joy will be higher than the sky when this promise comes to pass.