Phil Wickham When My Heart is Torn Asunder

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Body Thoughts

My days consist of much the same thing every day.  getting dressed and sometimes showered; washing the dishes from last night's supper; reading my daily Bible (I've decided this year once again to read through the Bible in a year.), cooking a light lunch and a dinner for my husband and myself and I try also to get some kind of exercise in to my day. I used to do 20 minutes to a half hour on my recumbent bike; sometimes ten minutes on the treadmill (all I can do til my hip starts to hurt too much to bear). Now I will be having PT and they will be assigning me exercises to do. The rest of my day is spent on line or reading.

My husband has greatly modified his diet.  Thus far (in just about two weeks) he has lost 11 pounds!!  Why is it that my body won't do that???  My husband would say, "Because you eat at least one bowl of cereal every night" --which is true but even when my calories for the day should allow for that bowl of cereal, I still do not lose anything.  I think it is because I haven't been consistent with any dietary or exercise regimes.  As my husband is forced to maintain such a strict diet, I will also be "forced" to join in and eat more healthfully.  It is hard...there will be no more, "Let's be lazy and get a pizza" nights.  Chinese food, occasionally, is still an option if we eat steamed veggies on brown rice.

My husband bought several cookbooks and eating programs for people with heart disease, Dean Ornish, the originator of the belief that heart disease can be reversed through diet, and a couple of later ones which are a little more lenient.  I will be studying these books later today and in the days to come in order to come up with recipes for menus and shopping lists.

It will be nice to do this as a team....to lose weight together.  I know he will lose it more quickly than I but it is not impossible for me.....I just have to not buy certain things that I know I cannot keep in the house without pigging out on them.  I've got a number of people who are supporting me in this effort online...  Unfortunately I've recently purchased some clothes, beautiful clothes that I can't wait to wear....and I bought them in my current size.  That was probably very stupid.  I was feeling hopeless about losing weight and feeling like maybe I should just get used to this body being the way it is and making it look as good as possible with nice clothes.  Nice BIG clothes.   I'm not sure what to do about it.  Wear the clothes while I have them...and maybe slowly start to purchase some smaller ones..  So that I can ease myself into gear for continuing to lose weight.  Give myself some goal clothes to shoot for.

It's time to just suck it up and DO IT.  Sometimes I think the hardest thing in the world is to get my butt out of this chair and exercise.  I haven't gotten across that magic line where working out becomes essential and fun and just a mandatory part of my day.  If I could just make it across that line I would be good.  I think that THAT should be my focus and my goal...even more important than how I'm eating.  Thus said, It's time for me to get up and do something.  I'll see  you later!!
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