Phil Wickham When My Heart is Torn Asunder

Friday, October 26, 2012

A Standoff

Well.  I"m borrowing a laptop and mine is now on its way home to me.  There is a storm which when it makes landfall will turn my world upside down  for at LEAST a week (Please God, let there be no permanent effects).  My husband just came home from Walmart...a stressful trip for him and so now I'm hiding  Hiding in my room til it is safe to emerge. I feel ill equipped to deal with all of these stressors.  For the past two days I've taken ativan....an antianxiety drug--simply to keep  myself from clawing my eyes out.
 
I got my drug, Enbrel, for long last and long awaited relief of my Psoriatic Arthritis.    Problem is I took the drug yesterday which means today i have even fewer resources than usual to deal with my life.  Today it's been gray and cloudy....an impossible emmisary from SANDY....No she will not send meek mild gray days to announce her arrival.  I've been drawing up a standoff in my head.  A match up of strength if you will.  On one side, Hurricane Sandy....an awesome force bearing unknown unanticipated punches.  And on the other side.  Me. And behind me, within me and before me: the Spirit of God. I do not know how God wants this faceoff to shape up.  I did buy coolers and a gas can.  We are trying to borrow a generator. Do these demonstrate lack of faith?  No.  The demonstrate lack of presumption. I know it is my job to prepare as much as I can and then to leave the rest to the Father.

I am asking that Sandy roll and sputter and turn herself stage right, right out into the ocean.  Will you join me in my prayers?  Our economy is hurting.  People are hurting.  Unemployment rampant.  And none of us....NONE of us, need to miss work, do costly repairs on our houses, or even -God forbid- lose life.  I'm asking for a weather reversal...I'm asking for the one scenario that has not been projected.  And I know my God can do it.  I pray that he WILL do it.
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