Friday, June 24, 2016

Higher Ground

Here is my status from this morning on Facebook.:
With major surgery a week and a half away, I am beset by worries. How will I manage putting ALL my weight on my right ankle for 5 weeks while the left one is recovering? My right ankle is just as bad as the left one. How will I get up the stairs of my deck? How will I manage cooking, washing dishes?.... I really need to be in a wheelchair....but our house is not accessible to that. .on and on the questions and the concerns come. Today I was reading Joni E Tada's devotional and this quote grabbed my attention:
"You broaden the path beneath me, so that my ankles do not turn."
2 Samuel 22:37

"Are you facing a mountainous trial today? It's not as scary as you think. The Lord knows where He's leading you; it's not a dizzying height. You, too, can live on higher ground."

On July 6th I will have the first of two surgeries, one on each ankle, to fuse them each at a 90 degree angle from my leg.  It is going to usher in a bunch of new "dis-abilities" as I learn to adapt to life without functioning ankles.  I am already limping badly because my ankles are already partially fused from the Psoriatic Arthritis....so I have some idea what walking will entail.  Hopefully, once the bones heal, I will be able to walk without pain (or at least in those joints...some other joints in my feet are also painful, just not to the degree the ankles are).

I am not scared by the coming pain.  Pain is no stranger to me and it really doesn't frighten me.  What terrifies me is the post surgical necessity of not putting any weight on my left ankle for at least the following 5 weeks.  My right ankle is just about as bad as the left one is...and for 5 weeks it will have to bear the weight of two ankles.  How will I manage steps?  How will I get my pants on?  How can I bend at all?  How will I cook, wash dishes and manage bathing?

I really need someone to help me.  For the first week or two I will likely be in rehab or a nursing home while I get recovered enough to manage somewhat on my own.  But that is when the "fun" starts...when they send me home.  I desperately need your prayers: that God will provide me with the help I need.  And meanwhile, I will look at the verse quoted above and know that "my help comes from the Lord, the maker of Heaven and Earth."

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